Phoenix: Ab Integro
by DancingHeya
Summary: The world is a dark place for many. There are feelings of hurt, pain, and sadness in every corner. There is darkness. There are the ashes. the ashes of what was once pure. But within these ashes, something will arise. As time passes, a sliver of light emerges from the pitch black. It rises. A phoenix. A new start.


Chapter 1

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It was a typical Tuesday night for Brittany and her daughter, Phoenix. They were having mac and cheese for dinner, the Scooby Doo shaped kind of course because the regular noodles are too boring, a cup of apple juice, and PJ clad mother and daughter. With long blonde hair, crystal blue eyes, and a bubbly personality, five year old Phoenix is the spitting image of Brittany. After pouring their juice, Brittany and Phoenix take a seat at their small, nut-brown coffee table which is located in the center of the living room. Normally, Brittany prohibited eating anywhere outside of the dining room, but she felt that her daughter deserved a treat every now and then.

Phoenix was everything to Brittany, all she had left really. She was her sunshine on cloudy days and her warmth on chilly nights. Brittany thought of her daughter as one of the only things she has done right. After a life time of being told she was stupid and couldn't do anything right, she could finally look at Phoenix knowing that she had. She proved them all wrong.

With a mouthful of mac and cheese in her mouth, Phoenix asks, "Mama, can we watch a movie?" Before Brittany can answer, the little girl attempts to shove more mac and cheese into her tiny mouth.

Brittany smiles as she cleans up her daughter's mess. Phoenix looks towards her mother expectantly, waiting for an answer. Before her daughter could ask again, Brittany says, "I don't see why not." Immediately, the look of joy is evident on the little girl's face.

"What movie do you want to watch?" Brittany questions as she stands up from her chair to grab the TV remote off the counter. Phoenix hummed while placing her finger to her chin in deep thought.

Suddenly, Phoenix screams, "I wanna watch Finding Nemo!" She races towards the DVD shelf. Brittany chuckles, they always watch this movie, not that Brittany minded though because she loves it as well. Brittany turns on the TV as Phoenix runs over with the Finding Nemo disc. After setting up the DVD player, Brittany grabs the remote to switch to the correct input, but before she can change it, she hears a voice. A voice she could never forget. A voice that still haunts her in her dreams.

Brittany takes a deep breath before glancing at the TV. She is met by a woman. A woman with long, dark, beautiful hair that has curls at the end and captivating dark mocha eyes to match. Brittany never thought she would see her again. Brittany avoided her at all cost, especially now, but for some reason, she could not take her eyes off the screen in front of her.

"So Santana, you have hit success over night, how does that feel?" the interviewer asks before holding up a microphone to Santana's mouth.

Santana smiles before saying, "It's insane. At the start of my career, I never thought that one song would send me to the top, but I'm very thankful for it." Brittany could tell that her smile was genuine. Santana is happy.

"Why don't you tell us about your song? What was your inspiration to write such a beautiful ballad?"

Santana takes a deep breath before answering, "Well, it was a girl. Well, not just any girl. She was my soul mate and every single day that I was with her, I had all of these intense feelings that I couldn't express, so I wrote her a song."

The interviewer puts her hand over her heart before asking, "When did the two of you meet?"

Santana quickly answers, "We met in middle school and we were best friends since the day we met."

The interviewer smiles before asking, "When did you fall in love with her?"

Santana thinks for a little while before saying, "Honestly, I think I was in love with her from the very first day we met. I just looked at her and I kept wondering how it was possible for someone to be so beautiful. I didn't really accept it until I was a junior in high school though."

The interviewer has a wide smile on her face while she says "That is so incredibly sweet. What does she think of the song and the success you have gotten from it?"

After that question, it is clear that Santana's demeanor completely changed. "Um…" Santana started before looking down at the ground. "Sadly, we're not really in touch anymore."

That last sentence broke Brittany's shattered heart just a little bit more. She quickly changes the input of the TV before wiping the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes. After she gathers herself, Brittany sits back down at the coffee table to resume her dinner. Although now, the Mac and Cheese didn't seem so appealing.

Phoenix looks over at her mother before saying, "Mama, she has the same name as that princess in the story you always tell me."

Brittany smiles at her daughter's innocence before nodding. She looks at her daughter before saying, "That's because it is." After wiping the tears away from her eyes once more, Brittany softly says, "That's the beautiful princess that comes to save the other princess from her tower."

Phoenix has a look of confusion for a moment, wondering how a princess could be on TV if one of her Disney movies were not on. Still confused, Phoenix says, "But that Princess looks just like the girl in the picture by the bed."

Brittany smiles softly as she tries to formulate the best way to tell her daughter about the love of her life. Before she can say anything, she is interrupted by Phoenix's lion-like yawn. "Okay sleepy head, why don't we ditch the movie and I can tell you more about princess Santana?" Phoenix responds with a nod of her head before yawning again. Brittany laughs as she picks Phoenix up and carries her to her room.

After laying Phoenix down on her small Twin sized bed and grabbing her stuffed kitten that she always sleeps with, Brittany reaches over to grab the wobbly stool in the corner of the room. As she takes her seat, Brittany asks, "Where do you want me to start?" Phoenix thinks for a while before asking if Brittany could start from the beginning.

With a small smile on her face, Brittany starts, "Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, lived two princesses. Princess B and Princess Santana. These two princesses, ruled the kingdom and all of the citizens bowed down to them. Unfortunately, some of the citizens called Princess B really mean names and because of these mean names, Princess B was locked away in a tower. Every day, Princess Santana would try to find a way to get Princess B out of this tower, but it seemed like nothing was working. After weeks of trying the most dangerous of plans and scheming incredible plots, Princess Santana became exhausted, but to Princess B's surprise, Princess Santana never gave up. One day, Princess Santana just sat right next to the tower and said how much she loved Princess B. She was a knight in shining armor and saved Princess B. They lived very happily for a long time, but Princess Santana kept leaving. She had to do other things now and she couldn't just be Princess B's knight in shining armor anymore. Santana left her to do other things and now she writes stupid songs about her." Brittany's eyes shoot wide open at what she just said. She quickly glances down at her daughter hoping she was not awake and thankfully, Phoenix was fast asleep.

Brittany kisses her daughter's forehead before putting the stool away and quietly walking out of the room. As she shuts the door behind her, Brittany finally allows herself to cry. It's been eight years. Eight long, painful years and while Santana makes music and lives her life, Brittany can barely afford to live in her one bedroom apartment. Still, even in her suffering, Brittany can't help but feel so incredibly proud of Santana. The late nights out and the week long trips finally paid off. Their breakup helped Santana succeed. If Brittany were there, she would have held Santana back. Brittany repeats the same mantra in her head that she has repeated for so long.

"It doesn't matter how sad I am. Santana is happy. I have Phoenix now. That's all I have to worry about." Brittany repeats that same mantra over and over again until she falls into yet another restless night.

The next morning, Brittany is startled awake to the sound of Phoenix talking very loudly to someone. She stands up swiftly and makes her way to her daughter who is in the kitchen. Brittany sees her daughter talking to someone with her phone.

Finally, Phoenix notices her mother's presence and says, "Thank you! I have to go now. Bye!"

Brittany eyes her daughter suspiciously, "Who were you talking to?"

Phoenix sets the phone down on the counter as she answers, "I was talking to Uncle Mike." Brittany softens. It's been a while since she last saw him because of the time she's taking off from the dance studio.

While pouring a bowl of cereal for herself and her daughter, Brittany asks, "What did he want?"

Phoenix stammers for a little bit before answering, "I called him. I wanted to see if he would come over, but he said he couldn't." Brittany doesn't believe her, but she decides not to confront Phoenix about it. Instead, she just nods.

After breakfast, Phoenix and Brittany decide to go for a short walk by the park. Strangely, Phoenix suggests that they go back home for lunch. The little girl always wants to eat at fast food places, but Brittany doesn't complain. Lately, money has been an extreme issue. With all of the payments due each month, Brittany can't afford to take her daughter out to eat at restaurants all the time. Money isn't coming in as heavily due to Brittany's absence at her dance studio, Fierce Snix. Shortly after opening, more and more people came to Fierce Snix after they heard that the owner was an amazing dancer and teacher. Unfortunately, Brittany's ability to dance frequently has diminished and that left her no choice other than to stay at home and do the paperwork and contracts for the studio. Over time, the students realized that Brittany would no longer be teaching, so they sadly left to go to another studio. Because of these events, this is how Brittany's debt has been piling up. If Brittany doesn't get more dancers to come to her studio, the bank will take it away. Her parents tried to help her in any way they could but once they learned their daughters' choices about having a daughter out of wedlock and trying to raise her on her own, they quickly cut off the funds and wanted nothing more to do with their daughter and grandchild. With that thought always in the back of her mind, Brittany's stress levels have increased drastically.

As usual, Brittany is shaken out of her fears of debt and foreclosure by her laughing daughter. Phoenix is by the pond looking at the ducks. Brittany wanders down to her daughter's side as Brittany wanted to see the ducks as well. Phoenix learned everything she knew about ducks from her mom.

Phoenix looks up at Brittany with a huge grin, her skin crinkling around her eyes slightly, "Mama, what happens to the princesses?" She asks, her eyes boring into Brittany's own. "Do they live happily ever after? Once Princess Santana stops being busy?" she added softly.

Brittany looks out at the pond, needing to think how she was going to answer her daughter. She knows she can't tell her the truth, she would spoil the magic of fairy tales for little Phoenix. Taking a deep breathe she finally answers, "Well I guess one day you'll have to stay up long enough to hear the end sleepy head" She tickles the little blonde under her chin. Phoenix laughs again, pushing her mother's hand always in hopes of stopping her.

Just when Brittany starts to feel a sense of joy and happiness again, dark clouds suddenly appear and soon it is pouring. Brittany scoffs inwardly before wondering why she could never have just a moment of pure bliss.

As the pair continues to be poured on, they hurry home. Brittany takes off her jacket and puts it over her daughter's head trying to minimize the chance of Phoenix getting sick. After ten grueling minutes, they finally get home. Before she could do anything else, Brittany rushes to get Phoenix a towel and a warm set of clothes. After making sure her daughter is okay, Brittany only then realizes that she is soaked to the bone. Hurriedly, she makes her way to her dresser and changes into her pajamas. With this weather it wasn't like she could go anywhere anyway.

Brittany returns to the living room to see Phoenix on the couch with a blanket in hand.

"Mama?" Brittany hears her daughter calling for her.

"What do you need sweetheart? Are you still cold? Do you feel sick?"

Phoenix just laughs before replying, "No mama, I feel fine. Can we watch Finding Nemo now? We didn't get to see it yesterday." Brittany smiles at Phoenix before nodding her head.

As Brittany moves to switch on the TV, she hopes that she doesn't have to see Santana on her screen again. Thankfully for her, there is no interview of Santana on the TV screen. However, there is a commercial of Disney Princesses that Phoenix is immediately enamored by.

Brittany waits patiently for the commercial to end, knowing that she wouldn't be able to present Phoenix with such toys. At times, Brittany thinks of herself as a bad mother. She cannot never afford toys for Phoenix and she can't even buy her daughter's favorite foods whenever the girl craves it. Brittany is taken away from her thoughts by a knock on the door. "Who could it be?" she thinks. It was still pouring hard and no one visited her without calling first.

Brittany slowly stands from the couch before being interrupted by yet another knock. "Just a minute!" Brittany says. She is still wondering who it could be, but hurriedly she makes her way to the door. Phoenix turns around on the couch and looks towards the door, she has a small grin on her face as she watches her mother approach the door. The knocking gets louder so without checking who the visitor could be, Brittany swings the door open. Her eyes widen in shock as she finds out who her visitor is.

"Brittany?"

Rooted to her spot, Brittany's eyes widen in shock. The only word she can mutter out is, "Santana?"

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